Here

Here is another delightful weekly update

Baseball and "Baseball"
Last week I played three games in three days. Baseball is not a super physical sport (espescially if you aren't hitting the ball) so it wasn't a bad thing. I am on two pretty good teams from the looks of things. Slo pitch we are sitting in third place over all and have a couple games on the first and second place teams (we haven't played as many) in baseball it seems like were doing ok. We haven't lost since I started playing and we have won every game by over 7 I think. I assume it has everything to do with my wicked awesome talent :D Ahah yeah right. For the baseball fanatics I am batting .428. Which is pretty good in my mind but it sure doesnt' feel good. Playing on two teams is crazy. I think I have atleast 3 games a week not to mention the conlicting nights where I have a game with both teams. Who do I play for? I have no idea. Enough about this.

Poor Spuds
This just in...potatoes are being discriminated against! I just heard on the news that some british farmers are trying to get the term "couch potato" taken out of the dictionary cause they feel it is giving the "humble spud" a bad "wrap" (the words of the news story). The story brought a tear to my eye. I never realized how our society had discriminated against the poor vegetable. Nothing was meant by my ignorance. It just sounds good to say "couch potato"...nothing else really flows as well as that does..just imagine saying these terms to someone...
Couch Broccoli - You can only say this if the person has a big green afro
Couch Pea - Well obviously we all think of a urin soaked couch
Couch Bean Sprout - Way to long to just blurt out at someone
Couch Apple - That's not even a vegetable
Couch Cucumber - this would only work if the person was really tall...and round or a leprechan or dressed up as a booger
Couch Radish - For some reason the word radish reminds me of a poopy diaper.
Couch Carrot - To many "c" sounds.
Couch Parrot - This may work...but is calling someone the smartest bird in the world...really an insult. The bird can friggin talk! They are basically humans with wings!
Basically my conclusion is that the potato should just suck it up and feel happy that it is getting just that extra little bit of publicity. Like they say in hollywood...any publicity is good publicity.

Charlie and the Chocolate Factory - July 15th
I can't wait! It looks wierd! Jonny Depp ROCKS MY WORLD!

Herse Accidents
A herse - something that carries a casket (not sure of the spelling) anyways.
I was driving down a street today. I turned right and BLAM right there was a herse backing right up. We didn't crash...heck...we didn't even really come close to crashing...but the thought in my head was "I wish I would of hit that herse" cause honestly. How funny of a story would that be! Maybe I am sick and morbid and twisted...but I really would like telling that story.

My Plan
I got my car about 3 years ago and have been putting on quite a few miles. The old girl is starting to wear down a little bit. Not bad...a little tune up would probably do her well but anyways. I have a plan that could not only save me money. But maybe even make me some money. The past few weeks I have been a little more alert than normal when driving...because...I am just waiting for a driver around me to make a minor mistake...cause my plan is to get in a big horrible accident and get my car written off and take the insurance money. The only way I can do this though is by being in an accident that is not my fault.

The mission
Trying to get into an accident but not causing it.
Trying to get into an accident that is 100% the other persons fault.
This is so hard! I can't cause an accident but I need to get into one. WHAT AM I TO DO! The only thing I can do is hope that someone driving near me blows a tire ...swerves into me, crashes me a little bit and then I "lose control" give my car a little extra gas into the nearest light post or telephone poll and the plan is complete :D I hope I don't get hurt!

Animal of the day
The wallabee
I don't know much about the animal...I really just like the name.
It's like...if there was a guy named "Blade" and I didn't know anything about him or even know him. I would probably tell people he was my best friend cause he had such a cool name. Is that wierd?

MSN NAMES
Everytime I sign onto MSN I always think "what should my name be" and then I look at other ppl's names for idea's and all I see are young kids, teens, even adults...expressing their love to their "signifigant other" through there name. And I think...what better way to do it...Rather than telling them to their face, type it in on MSN and then let everyone else see. Maybe the best idea ever thought of in the whole entire world. Here some names I have seen or thought of...to express my love to "my signifigant other" through my msn name.

My love is bigger than a giant mennonite perogie
I love you more than that one really cute duck we saw by the pond
How can I go on without you...pushing my wheelchair
According to Mcleans Magazine your the best girlfriend ever
My love for you is like the titanic...except for the sinking part

Then of course there are the names that are taken from song titles and lyrics. An example I have recently seen would be "Can't take my eyes off of you". Some of my fab choices would be.

"You are so beautiful...to me...Can't you see?" - That lady
"Bawitdaba da bang da bang diggy diggy...etc" - Kid Rock
"Let's get it on" - Marvin Gaye

my favorite choice

"Her eyes are as big as her bubbly toes" - Jack Johnson (Robyn loves it when I tell her she has bubbly toes...ahahaha. I am laughing out loud cause that is so wierd and untrue"

Then finally there are the names that are 9 sentances long and don't really make a whole lot of sense...

"I love you so much that when I see you next I might hug you and remember when we through rocks at that lamp and then a skunk came and at that big toad. Your the best! I love you so much that I am going to go hang out with my friends tonight and maybe bring your name up when we are shipping shitzu's around the world to be sold on the black market"
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Well I hope this has been good...
I finished pretty much everything on my house last week "floors, paint, ceiling, etc" so I hope to move in this week. I need a truck to haul over some of the smaller stuff before Itake over the large things so if anyone has a truck I could borrow for a day or two (i'll trade you for my car...but only if you try to get in accidents) that would be ideal.
931-0038 if you wanna make a trade for a day or two...
I have to go make a portfolio...


Next time...
How to kill time when your girlfriend leaves for four months
Why Puking sucks
New and improved pick up lines
and maybe even another interview with one of the fishes...who are all looking forward to the move...or dying on the way.